Most men in traditional Indian families live life of parasites

One of my colleague proposed a different caste girl for marriage. Impressed by her confidence, self drive and intelligence with beauty, he feel in love. But when it comes to marriage, in India, people who live with orthodox family members are more calculative. Moreover they are afraid, afraid of change and afraid of the constant nagging from family and society. The girl he proposed, preferred not to stay with his parents. Not because she had issues with them but because she wanted to live for herself, I don't find anything wrong in that. The act to serve elders should be out of respect and less compelling or forceful. I am sure, very few traditional thinking Indians would agree to this. Others would agree but just to show off.

Have you thought of the reasons?

• Elders have been doing this since ages.. It is hard to change the age old practise.
• Some elderly women have been compelled to provide service and now they expect the same to be done by the next generation.
• The Men are so comfortably made to enjoy the service, they are selfish enough to bring any change.
• Even the elder women have taught their kids and grand kids as well as expected to give service to the men.

Why would have my colleague not got married with the girl? It may be any of the above reasons!

These men are so accustomed to the pampering and luxury that its difficult for anyone to reject. If I were at their place, may be I would have no difference. They are meant to talk about social issues, their business and politics. The Women are asked to do all the toiling. They are treated like guests in others house but the female is expected to help the other females.
If my husband would pick up his soiled plate after dinner, it may be shocking for our old guests. One of my same age relative told me that he would never help his mom in the kitchen until he got married. It was then he realised how much he took his mom for granted. I believe it was never his fault. He wasn't expected to take care of his mom, even his mom would enjoy serving him like a prince.

I have heard that in foreign countries both the partners work for living and they share household work too. This may surprise many here. The people around me here are different. Many working-women after marriage in my locality cook dinner all alone or clean plates even after their hard work day.

My assumption is, in the old age women didn't have as many opportunities as they have now. Women are softhearted and they too deserve respect and acknowledgement of their work. Now is the time when the parasites will have to adjust a little if they want to still enjoy the luxury. Many females will start opting for neutral family! After all who likes to be slave?